Part 3: Don't Make Assumptions
Welcome to the third installment of our blog series inspired by "The Four Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz. If you've been following along, you know that these agreements have played a huge roll in my recovery journey. Today, we explore the wisdom of the third agreement: Don't Make Assumptions.
Assumptions can be silent saboteurs of relationships and personal growth. They are the stories we create in our minds about what others are thinking or feeling, often without any real evidence. Assumptions can lead to misunderstandings, conflicts, and missed opportunities for connection.
My assumptions were always rooted in my expectations. What ifs and Whys. Those assumptions kept me isolated and afraid to share my truth, and truly live a life of freedom.
Are you aware that almost everything we tell ourselves is an assumption? Making Assumptions and running with them- almost all of our conflicts are rooted in this, and it easy to imagine why.
unlocking the power of communication
Stay Curious: Ask questions to receive clarity on a situation or interaction. Create space within yourself to express your feelings and communicate authentically. Clarity is key.
Empathy and understanding: Reminding yourself that everyone’s doing the best they can. A solid mantra I used for a while was “Assume positive intent”. Realizing that even the practice of not making assumptions, provided space for me to truly connect with others on a deeper level.
Vulnerability: Open, honest communication dissolves walls of misunderstanding and mistrust. Just because we see a situation a certain way, doesn’t mean it looks like that to other people. Take ownership over your perception, and be willing to change your mind.
break free from assumptions
In the end I had to learn to be okay with not knowing. One of my mentors always used to say “The 18inch journey from your head, to your heart is the longest journey you’ll ever take”. That ended up being so true for my walk in recovery. The new freedom I found in this way of life- came from allowing myself to live, respond, and operate from within my heart and not my mind.
As you reflect on this agreement, maybe consider moments in your life where assumptions may have hindered your growth or your relationships. How might embracing clarity and open communication lead to deeper connections and personal development?
In our next blog, we'll explore the fourth agreement: Always Do Your Best. Until then, remember that clarity can be a powerful catalyst for positive change and bring major peace into your daily life.